When I get to talk story deeply with creatives, I will often ask the question:
“Do you ever judge your work?”
Probably 9.9/10 times the answer has been “yes” in some shape or form. Perhaps it’s not good enough (in their minds), misses the mark of what was intended to be created, or some other reason that can be [inserted here]. Recently, I heard an answer that I had not considered, which upon hearing it, made so much sense.
“Not anymore. I don’t let it get that far.” Aaron Kai, Native Hawaiian Artist, from the Big Island
It’s always super inspirational to get to connect with people from Hawai‘i, who like Aaron, have gone on to make waves (no pun intended since Kai is known for creating a very unique wave style).
I met Aaron last year through Waiākea and reconnected again as we recently worked together on the brand’s very first pop-up series highlighted by his work and a collab with the Bay Area streetwear brand Collect and Select.
Day one: Pau Hana at Pitch in Our Kaka‘ako
Day two: Pulehu BBQ Pā‘ina in Hilo
In truly solo mission fashion, Aaron made the trip back home to the islands from Los Angeles, where he now resides. That morning, his IG story told the tale making the case for elements of life feeling a bit like GTA.
That spoke to me as there have many times when I’ve approached projects and segments of life as though they were side-quests in supplement to the main narrative, much like a video game, but in this case, the movements of life.
Make sure I have what I need to make it through the mission of the day, most often work, or in some seasons, all the works as I went from job to job to job (and then came home to work on my craft as a writer).
Before you know it, BAM, back right where it began, entering the door I exited earlier to save and recharge between levels at the checkpoint or safe house aka my home.
Then run it all back…
I don’t remember exactly what Aaron said to me in between day one and two as I drove him back to the airport. We were talking about his kids when he shared with me that being a father taught him to be more malleable, which led to him saying something along the lines of:
As a creative, when it’s time to grind (like it was in that moment), you put in the work and go.
There’s a certain degree of fearlessness involved there.
It’s that burn the ships you arrived on and the bridges crossed type of vibe, full of belief in yourself because there’s no going back or being held down with doubts or limiting beliefs.
I know of it somewhat, having briefly touched upon it in some chapters, especially the written versions.
During what I consider my second prolific writing period, I created over 15 manuscripts, 2 screenplays, a libretto, of which a good chunk of all that was published. What wasn’t published or didn’t get shot or make it to the stage still taught me a great deal and just like jiu-jitsu, it was a win, because even though I didn’t ‘win’ in the stay winning sense, I won because I learned.
All that to say, I don’t think that I ever channeled that fearlessness into my visual art beyond riding waves of inspiration as they’ve come.
Which leads me to this unique crossroads where I’m enjoying what I am doing ‘professionally’ yet I need to figure out that art piece and make peace with how I am meant to create within it.
I’ve crossed the metaphorical dream bridge and spent time in open oceans but if I’m honest, I’ve always kept my eye on the bridge. Which is ironic because the one thing I heard every time as a kid at the beach is to always respect the ocean, never turn your back.
In this case, perhaps it’s the turning back that is the anchor because if one is to navigate across the vast expanse, one has to be looking all around, and perhaps most importantly, up, especially when there’s that Dark Night (of the Soul).
If you don’t know his work, experience it and enjoy it, because Aaron flows to his own beat and he’s doing it all with purpose, with drive, and he has taken where he’s from, with him.
To see him navigate the space in the time shared over those two days, then turn right back and hit the ground running to get back to his ‘ohana and because he had another teaching gig with keiki was truly epic.
I’m super grateful that I had the chance to hold some space, support his journey, and play a role in helping to create experience for his work to be shared with the world.
Mahalo Aaron or as my teacher would say, thanks for being out there.
A hui hou!
Learn more about the work of Aaron Kai: