Hug Your Inner Family
Whether it's your Inner Child, Teen, or Just Pandemic You, it's important to love on you
I am inspired by all the programs that are now available to people to get help with mental and emotional health issues. It’s not perfect, but there are more services out there, along with creative options for people to start and/or continue taking better care of their house within.
And that’s so needed with such extreme violence happening on the regular.
(Blustery - Cause sometimes the it’s a rather blustery day within)
From verbal violence, such as that littered throughout social media or that spewed by haphazardly in public from elected officials like Matt Gaetz, who has publicly body-shamed women holding different political views, to the violent cycle of domestic violence and mass shootings, it seems as though we are stuck in a Groundhog’s Day where Phil stopped emerging, period, because there is no end to the shadow being cast.
Add in the ongoing pandemic waves, new outbreaks of (not) fun sounding diseases like monkeypox, war here, war there, here’s a war, there’s a war, every leader needs a war-war, LIV Golf, and oh yeah, inflation. To sum it all up with one of my favorite local words/expressions:
Brrrrr-ah…
That’s just what’s going on outside. What we can see. But what about what’s taking place within each of us? What we can’t see…
Taking care of the Inner ‘Ohana housed within is not easy.
Pause to see that the world is made of a wide array of characters than think about how many characters we each have within, the fragmented displays of chaos we see all around almost seem a little more cohesive.
It’s as though there are a bunch of hurt inner children and teens running rampant in the world, acting out (INSERT the equivalent of like a bunch of little, whiny bishes HERE) and leaving the ruins behind for the rest of us to collectively clean up in aisle everywhere.
I often wonder, what would the world be like if taking care of mental and emotional health was truly prioritized, not just something that’s Trending Now?
I recently told my therapist that I thought something was wrong with me growing up because I couldn’t understand how I was feeling. You could say that “You’re just an old soul” only goes so far when you’re not old at all but I had not begun to think that perhaps bringing together the different parts of me was a good start, nor had I considered (or heard) that I have an Inner Child, an Inner This, That, All of the above.
So I did what I could to be a part of this world outside as best as can through my mid-twenties. Tired of finding the same ‘meh’ feeling, I dove really deep into what all those sacred texts throughout time have said, and LOL, hold so true, started to go within.
I remember engaging this through my dreamworld as I’d been taught. One of the earliest dreams being that of me running through a valley, sword in hand, ascending stairs to a cave and seeing what felt like hundreds of eyes staring back at me. When I awoke, I knew there was much work to be done as I took the Light within to find peace with the many moving parts that make me up.
It felt like I took such a long roundabout road and I’m still working on feeling okay and processing my emotions, thoughts, and really, just managing stress enough to really feel okay. If Okay-Ness is a baseline that I can live with, what does it take to always be at least there.? Because if we can’t maintain the baseline, no matter what, we can’t sustain anything above it for any reasonable length of time.
Soul let’s take this thought experiment…
Imagine walking about feeling like you’re wrong or unhealthy without being able to put a finger on why that is, undiagnosed anxiety, depression, two scoops whatever, and sprinkle specks of bullsh!t on it.
Now if that poop sundae isn’t on par with a sh!t cake, I don’t know…
As we watch more and more mass shootings and ridiculous, sickening violence in all its forms against children, women, and people of color unfold, I cannot help but wonder what would happen if consistent investment in programs that help people to heal would have on the collective experience.
We are mired in a cycle that has infrequently invested in taking care of one’s mental and emotional health. I believe the lack of care to our Inner Care is a big reason as to why we see such manifestation of extremes that result in the taking of life. Whether it’s an individual ill-equipped to cope taking her/his own life in some way or someone acting out and killing others, even the smothering of positivity and dreams, humanity is stuck in a very destructive space as evidenced by past points dotted throughout history.
And I don’t think it’s about working harder. It’s about working together, and smarter.
I was raised to work hard and ask any of my bosses in the past two decades and I’m confident they’ll tell you I was among their top performers. Except for that one FTG (Eff that guy), for real eff that guy. I have worked hard in the system but if I’m honest, all that lead to was exhaustion, which caused my earlier inner turmoil and not being able to manage myself mental and emotional health, and that led to a clusterfuck of meh being pretty f@cking low.
I’ve never gone beyond ideation, like serious ideation, but I’ve flirted at times at what would life be like if I wasn’t here. And that’s honestly scary because I have also very much frequented a space where I feel like I do really have a lot going for me and feel grateful for the blessings Life has Flowed my way. I feel lucky because I have learned to recognize the weight of the low and what it does to my overall well-being.
Here’s another thought experiment for you:
Where many of are a few paychecks from joining our brothers and sisters who are houseless on the streets, I would venture it safe to say that a great majority of us of are but a few excruciating life circumstances from going over the edge.
Imagine if you will, being the person who has any mix of losing a loved one, broke, can’t keep a healthy relationship, has a substance dependence issue to cope, poor health, and what her/his life is like. Walk in those mismatched shoes, struggling with that weight, and throw something extra on top of it.
Soul what?
We can wax poetic all we want about work harder, pick yourself up by the bootstraps, but IMO we’re exhausted and our tanks are running low on energy to keep pushing. I’m just speaking from experience of exhaustion and also on three occasions now, from three separate therapists, over the course of my walk in this life, who’ve all told me that being exhausted, working too much, is what kicks my depression into high gear.
Soul we have to work smarter, by bringing what’s within together.
The best work I’ve ever done has been being present, being mindful, and feeling. The most amazing art I’ve ever created is raw and honest. In a way, I realize that I need the all of the above answer to life experiences in order to really create the best work and version of myself, but having had chapters of feeling numb, wanting nothing more than to feel a better version of that numb, with even less feelings than numb, the only answer I can share is that it really is all beautiful.
Driving myself to the point of breaking, learning to pick up the pieces, finding Love and the Higher Power embedded like an artist’s signature on the vast Grand Tapestry of Creation. It’s mind-boggling. It gives me the Peace nothing else can while also encouraging me to take another step because surely, so long as there’s breath, there is Life, and if there is more Life, there is more I am here to learn and be a part of.
Soul step back from all the words here as this is just my observation, my Truth, which I’ll someday look back and ideally laugh upon, and check in with yourself.
How you feeling?
No, how are you really feeling?
Because that’s what it’s about. It’s about feeling, for in feeling we connect, and if we connect, then we realize we aren’t so alone and all the hurt Inner Children, Teens, and Other Characters running around in these flesh suits are figuring it out too.
Maybe that will allow us to better allow others to be as they are, where they are, and hopefully ease tensions, and start to curb all the forms of violence.
While we are maybe-ing about, maybe, just maybe we should smile more, say hello again. Make pleasantries pleasant again. You want a Make something something again, how about starting with that and seeing where it leads because these clowns in political office can only do so much, all parties, and those idiots with lifelong court appointments too.
If our leaders can’t lead, it’s up to us to lead within our lives and who better to lead the Inner ‘Ohana than you? Soul give your whole being a hug. After all, I’ve heard it said that God made our arms just long enough so that we could gives ourselves a hug when we need to.
Thx for being out there.